Ramona Mae

I know it’s a gotta be a pretty small niche…
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Lately, when I get in my car and begin the drive to or from the hospital I find myself being uncharacteristically cautious. When someone taps their brakes in front of me or takes advantage of a super-stale yellow light, my heart freezes up in fear.
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When I meet someone who is new to infertility, I always have in mind a few things I’d like to share with them if the opportunity arises. One is that infertility is a multi-faceted loss. It’s not just not having a baby. As you move through your grief, you have to face new losses, big and small, that haven’t occured to you before. Some big losses on my list were: the ability to plan your future, genetic continuity, being “like other people”, experiencing the fullness of what our bodies were made to do and parenting the next generation.
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We’ve been overwhelmed (in a good way) by all the support, prayers and wisdom in our community. And I’ve been surprised by the number of people whose hearts have been captured by Ramona’s struggle to survive. It seems like every time I turn around someone says “Oh yeah, my college roommate’s cousin’s hairdresser was reading Mona’s blog and…”. Which leads me to believe there must be more of you praying for, thinking about and checking on Ramona’s progress than even your almost 500 comments indicate. So, satisfy our curiosity, if you’re out there lurking, just post a brief comment saying who and maybe where you are. Regular posters feel free to join in, it’s an all-skate.

Just a quick note to revise a previous posting error.
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Andy and I got a lot of much needed sleep last night. We both agree that, besides the night of her surgery, the 30 hours we had Ramona at home was the most terrifying experience of our lives.
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Ramona’s echo came back showing that there is blood flow. The cardiologist will now compare this echo with the one taken post surgery and see if there is any notable change. They believe her lack of sleep, nausea and inconsolable crying has been the result of methadone withdrawal. She is receiving some meds and care in the PICU once again. The estimate is that she will be there until the middle of next week. Ramona is in good hands and will get some rest tonight. Jane and Andy have gone home for some much needed rest themselves. They were all up for most of the 30 hours Ramona was home.
Please join me in praying for a peaceful restorative night’s rest for all of them. May the Lord Bless You and Keep You.

Ramona has been re-admited to the hospital and is back up in the PICU. They are doing a new echocardiogram to determine if she is still getting good flow where they opened things up during her surgery on Valentine’s Day. If the test shows that what they did is holding and working as it has been then they will look into what is causing her distress. (Feeding schedule etc)
If the echo shows that Ramona is no longer getting adequate flow they will begin to talk about comfort measures for her and possible hospice care.
Either answer will be understandably very difficult for them. Please Pray for Jane and Andy as they wait to hear.

I just spoke with Jane very briefly and they have taken Ramona to the ER. Ramona’s oxygenation is back in the 40’s and 50’s and the doctors are trying stabilize her. This is more than Jane and Andy can take care of at home. Please pray that if she needs more care than they can provide her the doctors will not hesistate to take the burden off Jane and Andy.
Please pray for discernment for the Doctors and nurses who are with Ramona, and for strength for Jane and Andy.

We are now trying to determine if Ramona needs to be readmitted. She has vomited twice today her entire stomach contents and has been sleepless and sometimes inconsolable since we brought her home. Twice she has become so upset that she has had significant trouble breathing and has broken into a sweat, which can be a sign of heart failure.

Please pray we will be able to wisely discern when it might be time to make this important choice and that we’ll be be able to tell when we are no longer able to keep her safe at home.